Epiphany

I got up early to eat something before sunrise and then go back to bed, and then I had a sudden revelation about what I might want my Div III to be. (Even when it hits me like this early in the morning, I'm afraid to commit to it.) So I'm writing it down so that I don't forget once I go back to sleep! And I'm writing it down publicly for feedback or dialogue or something!

Alright. So. I think, if I were to start my Div III tomorrow (or I guess even this morning when I get up for real) I would want to do it on Christian law. Obvs there's not a Christian version of halakha or sharia, but the RCC definitely has law and dogma, and most mainline protestant denominations at least take stances on controversial issues, so there's plenty to work with. I want to look at the ways that law has developed, and the ways it's interacted with Biblical interpretation, especially in the works of Paul. I'd want to see developments across time in areas like slavery, alcohol/temperance, women's rights, homosexuality, etc. I don't know yet if I'd focus on certain denominations or certain issues or what, 'cause this is kind of huge right now. But I know I want to work with Paul and Biblical scholarship/interpretation, and church law.

And those aren't things I knew 6 hours ago.

I've been spending tonight finally starting to pull my thoughts together to apply for these two super-sweet summer programs that I found. What's that, you say? I didn't post about them already? Well fortunately for you there are some websites you can look at if you're that into the minutiae of my life and you aren't my mom (who got these links weeks ago).
Center for Student Missions City Host
Pendle Hill Young Adult Leadership and Development Program
They're basically two programs that will give me a place to live and some food and also pay me (!!) to spend the summer talking about how I love Jesus a whole bunch (I do) and also doing some sweet community service work. But I have to apply! And that means that I have to write personal essays about my faith and my past service and all sorts of things! And I've never done that before! So that's where this blog entry comes in. If you are so inclined, I'd love to have some people read through some drafts of these statements and give me some feedback. What makes sense, what does not sound like something I should tell someone I want to give me money, what is lovely and touching and should be expanded on. I spend a lot of time thinking and writing about these sorts of things, but that doesn't mean I've figured out a very good way to do it.

Which means that I am going to have like 40 drafts of this thing. I'm working on one right now that just sort of follows my spiritual journey chronologically and that I may break down into themes and reorganize at some point. I'm not going to post it here because it will just take up so much space (it is almost 5 single-spaced pages, so I need to cut out about half of it), but I'll happily e-mail it to you. Just leave me a comment or shoot me an e-mail (as always oneseventy at gmail dot com) and I'll give you a copy.

Evening

I really like riding the bus at night-time. I start out in the early evening, around 7. The bus is fuller then. Invariably I sit towards the back. There's not much but black outside. We ride under a streetlight, it only illuminates the dirt on the window. When I do catch sight of a sign or a building, it seems foreign, and there's a moment of terror before I remember where I am. The world collapses down to just the bus, me and the people on it. They're never only college students, always some local transients mixed in. People do homework, sleep, talk, laugh. I turn my iPod up and listen to something slow and sad. Most people get off the bus before me, and then I go to class.

After class, it's much later. 9:30. Tonight I walked all the way through Northampton because it was nice out and I needed the walk. I got on the bus on the other side of town, by Sheldon Field. It was fuller than I expected, and I sat towards the front. At the front of the bus, you can see the outside world because of the headlights. I'd walked for half an hour; I was in touch with that world. Snow covered fields, barns, houses. Everything is familiar and beautiful. I thank the driver when I get off, walk home across the ice.